Brick (adopted)


First troll member of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch, hired under Lord Vetinari’s “special hiring procedures,” at the same time as Cuddy (a dwarf) and Angua (a werewolf). Before getting this job, Detritus had been a splatter, (like a bouncer, but with more force,) and hired muscle for various establishments in Ankh-Morpork. However, he came unstuck one night when instructed to splat six-foot Dwarf Carrot Ironfoundersson, who, no doubt, had been brought up by Dwarfs to have an appropriately robust and non-nonsense attitude to any troll who tried it on. The fact Carrot laid him cold must have helped simplify things later in their Watch relationship, as regarding rank and seniority.

City trolls are generally not very smart because of the high temperature, and Detritus is dumb enough that even city trolls consider him stupid. Regardless, Detritus is another natural sergeant in a way very different from Fred Colon; Detritus has a big voice and can shout until the suspect confesses without knowing what it is that he is supposed to confess to. Detritus is also the main drill sergeant training new recruits, as the Ankh-Morpork City Watch grows.

One of the reasons behind Detritus’s emerging cleverness is the special helmet he is wearing which has a fan that cools his head. (Since trolls’ brains are made from impure silicon, they work better when cooled.) The helmet has been constructed by his friend and first partner on the job, acting-constable Cuddy, (deceased). In colder climates, (such as Bonk winters,) Detritus displays intelligent wit and humour, and if left exposed to the icy coldness of the Pork Futures Warehouse long enough, reaches extraordinary levels of intelligence; however this is also a near-fatal temperature for even trolls.

Detritus’s weapon of choice is a crossbow called the Piecemaker which he modified himself. It was originally a 2000-lb-draw siege crossbow firing a large iron rod. It is now a crossbow that fires a large bundle of ordinary wooden arrows. Generally anything it is fired at is disintegrated, along with anything else behind it, and finds good use in opening up an entrance to a building, as well as an exit, with the same shot. Detritus is not very good at aiming with that weapon, but given its destructiveness it does not really matter. In any case, even when he aims, the arrows are capable of shooting outwards in all directions around him. The people around him get a bit nervous, because Detritus has never managed to understand the concept of the safety bolt.

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