One Hag, Two Hag

Chapter One
Welcome to Ankh-Morpork

Chapter One

Three traveling companions make their way to the city of Ankh-Morpork. A cleric of Blind Io, a vampire wizard, and a halfling con-artist. The three met each other along their way to a similar location, and decided to stick togeather.

Arriving in Ankh-Morpork in the late evening, they were surprised to find it dark and quiet, unlike the stories of the busy city they had always heard of. Once inside, they felt as if they were being followed and noticed a strange shadow lurking behind them and dart into an alley.

The cleric felt uneasy and convinced the party to investigate, much to the dismay of the wizard. They followed the shadow down the alley until it came to a dead end, where they discovered the ture nature of their lurker.

A zombie!

They immediatly attacked, unknowing that things in Ankh-Morpork were not quite the same as the outside world. They were shocked to find that the zombie called for the help of the watch, and more so that the watch actually came to the creatures aid!

The thundering footsteps of Detritus followed by the arrival of Captain Carrot quickly put an end to the encounter. And before the party was entirely sure what was going on, they found themselves in a cell at the city Watch’s headquarters.

Samuel Vimes, the leader of the watch, breifly introduced himself and damanded an explanation from the group. Which of course the con-artist, used as an opportune moment to “rat-out” his companions. Vimes, not believing a word of it, proceded to explain the punishment in Ankh-Morpork when the door was slammed open.

He introduced himself as Mr. Slant, and at first had the appearance of a very old man. But on closer inspection they very old man was actually a very DEAD man. He was the head of the Ankh-Morpork lawyers guild, and explained that they were being sued by his client for assault.

But before that could get any more insane, the door was slammed open again and a young and terrified looking man entered. He relayed a message that the party members had been summoned to speak with the Patrician. After a subtle warning from Vimes, they party headed out right away.

They were ushered into his office right away, and sitting at his very elaborate desk was Lord Vetinari himself. He explained his need for a group of adventures to find a specific item. A staff to be exact. And with only a few suggetions on where to start, sent the party on their way.

After spending the eveing in an inn, the party began their search at the Unseen University.
Ponder Stibbons indtoduced himself, and when asked about the particular staff, he suggested they ask the Archcancellor.

So up the vast stairs they went until they reached Mustrum Ridcully’s office. The old wizard greated them warmly and loudly, and asked what it was they needed. When they explained they needed the staff, Ridcully suggested the library and was interrupted by Ponder who suggested the tree, which they came to find out was like a giant filing cabinet.

They decided on the library first, where they met the Librarian. Shocked that he was an Orangutan, they were unsure of how to react. But Ponder took care of it for them and asked for a book which had the item that they were looking for in it. After a short wait, he returned with a large book wich proved to be less than helpful.

So Ponder excitedly led them to the “Tree”. It looked like a giant oak tree, but with a large door on the front. The party was hesitant at first, but then entered the tree. The inside was like an endless white hallway lined with doors on the left and right.

They breifly explored each of the doors before finding the correct one, finding things like lovely feilds, oceans, a feast, beholders, and other strange occurances. Even a room where one has the ability to use any magical spell despite even having the skill to use magic. After using an array of horrible spells on the wizard they met there, just for their own amusment, they left to find the correct door.

Inside the correct door was a small hall with nine pedistals on it. All of the pedistals held rare magical weapons, including the staff they were looking for. After toying with the weapons they could not have, they actually investigated the staff in question. It was discovered that the staff was currently residing in a cave, and small map was engraved on the pedistal.

The vampire copied down the map, and the group exited the Tree. They aquired horses from a nervous stable owner, and headed to the swamp where the staff was last seen.

To Bubblegloop swamp they went, having a breif encounter with the Anhk-Morpork theieves guild. Once inside the swamp, they ran into some of the local swamp zombies, but soon found out that the zombies outside of Anhk-Morpork were not the same as the citizens inside.

They fought their way through to a cabin where they met a Voodoo witch and her companion Eugean the mummy. She explained vaugely that she would help them and sent them on their way. And by finding the zombies a long the path that were pointing the way, they got through the swamp easily. That is… until the swamp dragons.

Swamp dragons are not particuarly threatening, but when excited they tend to explode. The vampire remebered this in time for the comanions to make their escape, there by finding the cave they had been looking for.

The exploration of the cave could only have been described as… interesting. All the traps had been sprung. The guards killed. And then, though not a surprise, the treasured staff was gone.

On the pedistal was a note that read:

“Being that this is the century of the Fruitbat, we of the castle Modoscousin have decided that the day and age of keeping magical items in far away caves hidden in swamps are over. We have removed it and it is stored here in our castle.” – And a small hand drawn map was drawn on it.

With a sigh, a dirty word, and some encouraging words, the party left the cave towards the castle Modoscousin.

Once there, the gaurds seemed hostle at first. They were barred entry when all of a sudden the gaurd on the left side of the door was suddenly… behind it. A girl in an obscenely pink and sparkly dress had opened the door and waved franticlly to them.

She excitedly introduced herself as Jem, and explained that she was a princessandalwayswantedtobeanadventurerandhowcoolitwasthatthey- In short very quickly talked about anything and everything. She was a very happy person, clearly. Think five year old with pixie sticks at Disney.

She GLADLY took them down to where the staff was kept and handed it over, AFTER a promise to let her join them in their adventures. She hurried off to pack, and then adventureres slipped QUICKLY away from their…. “new teammate”.

And so, back to Ankh-Morpork they went. Once they arrived, it was late and a good time for a rest before speaking with the Patrician. They stopped at a cheap inn for the night, and the con artist decided to keep it save under his mattress in case of theives.

This was not a good idea.

Upon awakening to the broken staff, and triying frantically to fix it, they headed to the Patricians office under the impression that maybe he would believe they had found it broken like that in the first place.

When he was handed the staff, and explained that had always been crushed like that, he smiled and stood up. He lifted the staff up with both hands and broke it over his knee.

Jaws dropped.

He picked up a tiny red orb that had fallen out of the staff. “This, gentalmen, is why we needed the staff.”

The patrician, being a busy man, gave brief thanks to the adventurers and gave them their rewards. They were sent on their way, confused but with a good prize in hand.


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